Wendell Read My About Joost

About Wendell Read My About Joost

If you include \"Read My About\" in my name in your email, I will report you as a spammer.I work for the best boss I\'ve ever had, 100% WFH, very well compensated, 5 weeks of vacation per year, and I enjoy what I\'m doing; if you think you can beat that, include the targeted rate range in USD W2 (per hour or per year) and the phrase,\"I like your hat\"(Amazon recruiters, please use,\"I support unionizing warehouse workers and delivery drivers\".)If you send a Calendly link without including the key phrase above, I will setup a meet and no-show.FAQ-There\'s a link to my resume below-My phone number is in my resume-No, I won\'t fill out your job application; that\'s why you have my resume-US Citizen-W2 only (not negotiable, no 1099/C2C)-I am not a government employee-I will do a urine test, but only if the hiring manager holds the bottle-I code in C#, not Java; no desire to change-I like doing screen share code interviews-\"What do you want from your next position?\"- to hear the \"beep beep beep\" of a dump truck full of cash backing up to my yard every payday. Think of a reasonable rate. Now add 1/3 more. Email me the number-I will do your online coding tests or \"Take home coding problems\", but I want 2x the hourly rate offered for the position, payable in advance, 4 hour minimum-Don\'t waste your time trying to sell me on your \"hybrid work\" model, or your \"open office team collaboration\" environment; I\'ve been 100% remote work since 2012, I\'m never going back to an office-\"Have you ever: faced a difficult problem / been under a lot of pressure / had to make an unpopular decision / made a mistake\"- Yes. I was a Sergeant in the Marine Corps and a Software Development Engineer at Microsoft.Prepare to be pranked if-You ask me to take an online personality test; both MBTI (Myers-Briggs Type Indicator) and my horoscope have the same scientific basis (none) and I don\'t work for people who believe in superstitious hogwash-You ask me for a CV instead of a resume-If you claim that your interviews are \"language agnostic\"; I will whiteboard code in Fortran, Lisp, and COBOL.If you want \"Rock Star Developers\" please be prepared to treat us that way; the above is my equivalent to,\"No brown M & Full Stack Developer using C#, ASP/MVC, JavaScript; also got C++, SQL Server, Microsoft Access, Windows Installer / WiX, Sharepoint 2013/2010, and a host of other skills.Link to my resume: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1AsNiplf7hhMZcxDTQX3ldXPvPvd7a0ceVlrFkEx3IMs

Experience

1. Senior Software Debrouillard

   Swyfft

   May 2016 — Present · Redmond, WA, US

Education

• University of Washington

  BA, Computer Science, Psychology

Skills

• Software Engineering
• Xml
• C++
• Sql
• Asp.net
• Ssis
• Web Applications
• Cloud Computing
• Software Project Management
• Integration
• C#
• .net
• Xslt
• Software Design
• Agile Methodologies
• Microsoft Sql Server
• Access
• Databases
• Html
• Windows
• Visual Studio
• Internet Information Services (Iis)
• Testing
• Sharepoint
• Iis
• Javascript
• T-Sql
• Web Services
• Software Development
• Scrum
• Asp